Sunday, July 17, 2011

Retold

This story was told to me tonight.
It made me smile.
“Where did you Get those Boots? I really like them”
“Weeeelllllll,
I was on my way from one little southern hothouse to another, the truck was running good and I was feeling great. The South was feeling mighty fine just then. I realized that I needed to stop, drop some water off, and pick up some water for me, and some Gas for the truck .It was a needful  situation and one in which I approved. The convenience store that I pulled in to seemed to be  just the spot, I walked in to pay for my gas and realized two things. One, it was a mite bigger on the inside than the out, 2, it was not just a convenience store, it was a CASINO/convenience store!
I walked right on over to the fun part of the store knowing that may truck was parked just in front. Safe as could be.
 I guess.
I stuck 5 dollars in a spinning wheel poker machine, placed the max bet and spun that little bandits arm.
Straight flush.
The lights started to flashing and the whistles and bells to a ringing. Little lady ran right out of the back room, unplugged the machine and opened a door to reveal its guts. She pulled a little printed ticket out from its innards and I walked up to the payout and then out the door.
750.00 dollars richer than when I had a walked in.
Hopped in my truck and started off down the road.
15 miles later I remembered that I had forgotten water, gas and pissing.
Damn.
So I took the very next exit and pulled into the first place I figured would have a usable toilet.
It was Carlos’s Boot Hacienda, which makes no damn sense in Louisiana but the bathroom seemed fit.
I decided while I was there to treat myself to a new pair of boots, figured a hundred dollars ought to do the trick.
Then I saw these.
I had to have them and they was only ½ of the money the CASINO had just givin me.
Sold.
Then I got emptied out, filled up the truck and me and sashayed right on out of there.
That was, at least my intent.
I remembered that I was heading to my sister’s house to cook some food and light some fireworks with her children for the fourth of July.
So I pulled into the fireworks store and unloaded my over-full wallet on them for half my winnings worth of fireworks.
Watching those kids, light them fireworks, running around with the lit punks trailing embers and smoke with my new boots on the table in front of me.
Best damn fourth of my whole life.
I guess.